5 words you should NEVER use if you want to be successful in life

You’ll get your dream job. You’ll finally be able to work on that idea. You’ll mend that relationship. You’ll do so much MORE if you STOP saying these 5 Words to yourself.

Ever wondered why you don’t get things done?

It can be…

Working on that great idea you’ve had for a while now.

Attending that really important event at your kid’s school.

Going out more with your spouse/lover/friends.

Getting started on the workout routine.

You promise yourself that it won’t happen again next time. But you feel frustrated that you can’t change. This affects you more than you think it does. You start saying NO to almost anything that scares you!

Result?

Regrets, frustration, and an endless cycle of negative thoughts and hopelessness.

Why did this happen?

You used negative words while making a resolution to yourself. Your mind listened to it and let you act accordingly.

Once you remove these 5 words from your vocabulary, you’ll add more happiness and love to your life.

Word #1: TRY

“I should try this exercise tomorrow.”

“Damn! I should try to quit drinking.”

“I should try to work on this idea. It’s been so long..”

You’ve said this, haven’t you?

When you say that you’re going to TRY, you’re telling yourself that you’re NOT committed.

The word TRY also creates room for escape and excuses. It never gives you a chance to let go of the fear of doing something you haven’t done before.

You unconsciously tell your mind that you can’t do anything if you don’t workout or start working on that idea. If the pattern of not doing things keeps repeating, you’ll feel like giving up on yourself before you even start doing things.

So, instead of saying that you WILL TRY, just say that you WILL or you MUST.

“I will start exercising”

“I must work on that idea tomorrow” …

… And so on.

You’re holding yourself accountable if you say you will do it. So, you’d end up doing what you wanted to.

If you end up doing what you wanted, you’ll be proud of yourself and trust yourself more. This’ll improve your confidence and naturally, others will be drawn towards you too.

Word #2: BUT

Here’s what Coleyville, a Texas Communication Consultant has to say about the word BUT

“It acts like a mental eraser and it often buries whatever you’ve said before it.”

“I wanna start writing that book BUT I don’t think I’m good at writing.”

“I want to ask him/her out BUT I don’t think I can do it.”

Sounds familiar?

When others add but to their conversation, your mind is automatically tuned to listen to what they say after it. Most times, anything that comes after a BUT isn’t something you want to hear.

So, if you use BUTs while talking to yourself, your mind automatically pays more attention to what you say after it.

In our example, the mind will be focused on

I don’t think I’m good at writing.

I don’t think I can do it (ask someone out).

This adds to the negative feedback and you end up thinking writing isn’t for you or you don’t have the guts to ask someone out.

Now, all you have to do to change this thought process is to flip the places of the sentences before and after but.

I don’t think I’m good at writing BUT I want to start writing a book.

I don’t think I can ask someone out BUT I want to do it.

If you do this, your mind will start nudging you to do things you were scared of before. And you will do it, at least to shut out that annoying voice.

It’s ok if things didn’t turn out as planned BUT you tried and you should be proud!

Word #3: IMPOSSIBLE

Writing pads with motivational quotes were a rage when I was in school. One of the quotes said,

“There’s no such thing as impossible. The word impossible itself says I’M POSSIBLE”

Every time you tell yourself that something’s impossible, you’re just creating an invisible barrier between you and success.

Before you’ve tried something, you’re telling your mind that you can’t do it. You’re limiting your own potential, skills, and opportunities if you’re telling yourself that you can’t do it.

If you’re telling yourself that it’s impossible to get that job, you won’t. That’s because your mind is closed off to any possibility of you getting that job.

You’re also creating inner resistance and closing the doors to any motivation that might come your way.

So, instead of telling yourself that it’s impossible, take baby steps to go after what you want. Yes, it’ll feel scary at first but you’ll eventually get over it.

Word #4: DON’T

You probably used this word while asking yourself not to cry in front of others. Or your parents did.

We guess you didn’t stop crying when you were told not to. The word “don’t” is a very weak modifier and doesn’t add anything to your imagination.

Next time, tell yourself what you must do instead of stopping yourself with “DON’T”.

Example:

Substitute “Don’t cry” with “It’s going to be okay. Calm down” and notice how you feel.

Word #5: SHOULD

Surprising, huh?

Should indicates self-criticism and encourages a rebellious attitude. Yes, it’s possible to rebel against yourself.

Most people also use the word should when they’re setting up an impossible benchmark for themselves.

“I must workout” is an example of nudging yourself in the right direction.

“I should be working out” indicates more force than necessary.

No one likes to be forced or compelled to do things that they don’t like. It’s the same with you.

So, cut yourself some slack without making yourself lazy and complacent. Find the sweet spot and don’t use SHOULD.

Removing these 5 words from your vocabulary will help you cut off the negative feedback loop that your mind generates. You’ll be able to be kinder to yourself, focus on the task without worrying too much, and eventually achieve what you seek.

Keen on learning more about the power of words? Sign up for the ZIng’s Power of Words Workshop.

The workshop is conducted by Zingformation’s Umesh Soman. He has trained a varied audience that ranges from families to one of the largest MNCs in the world.

Participants who attended his two-hour workshop said that it had been an eye-opener for them. Rakesh Patil, one of the participants, said he was surprised to learn how words impact his long-term goals in life.

Harnessing the power of words to change your life is simpler than you thought. It requires conscious thought and a nudge in the right direction. The Power of Words workshop provides more than just a nudge. So, sign up right away and tell us: